New data from Santander UK reveals a troubling rise in romance scams. Data from the bank shows more than £3.8 million was reported as stolen from customers in the last six months, an increase of 27% on the previous six-month period1, affecting customers aged from 18 to 93 years old.

Santander’s behavioral expert, Peter Staffell, and BBC The Traitors’ star, Paul Gorton, have teamed up to explore why, despite nearly two-thirds (65%) of people believing they would never become a victim, our natural reaction to loneliness in today’s digital age is creating an opportunity for scammers to exploit. 

Over half of people (55%) feel lonely at some point. A third (31%) say they would use social or online forums to meet new people to combat feelings of isolation and a similar number (33%) believe they can form a deep emotional connection with someone simply by speaking online.

Unfortunately, this creates an opportunity for scammers, and over half of Brits (50%) have received unsolicited romantic or flirtatious messages online, which they either suspected or turned out to be scams. Facebook and Instagram have become hunting grounds for “romantic” scammers, with more than two-thirds (72%) of the suspicious messages received on these platforms.

Once an emotional connection has been formed the scammers can execute their plan, with nearly a third (29%) of people saying they would offer financial support to a romantic partner they’ve known for less than six months. This number rises sharply to more than half (58%) where the relationship has been going on for longer than six months. Common reasons cited by scammers requesting money ranged from support with medical expenses, to simply requiring a gift.  

Peter Staffell, Behavioural Expert at Santander UK, explains:

“Scammers are experts at presenting themselves as someone you can trust, someone who ‘gets’ you. They play the long game, building a relationship before executing on their scam and, as our research shows, it’s a natural instinct for many of us to willingly lend a financial hand to someone who we have formed an emotional bond with.

“Then they’ve gone. The scam is complete, and the impact extends far beyond the financial losses, leaving emotional scars and often people feeling more isolated than before. You can take control though, a few simple checks when you first start to speak to someone, and before your emotions take hold, can reveal a lot about the person you’re speaking to and save heartache further down the line.”

Paul Gorton, 'The Traitors' star, said: “In my experience, it's surprisingly easy to build deep trust, especially when someone is charming and says all the right things. As we start to feel a connection, whether it's real or not, we can end up overlooking red flags and ignore any warnings from others around us.

“Stay vigilant to spot a traitor, it’d be too easy if they simply messaged you out of the blue asking for your money. Approach any new relationship with cautious optimism, complete checks and having your wits about you at the start.”

To raise awareness about the dangers of romance scams, Santander has created a poem in the style of William Shakespeare, performed by Paul Gorton and now available on Instagram. The poem highlights common tactics used by romance fraudsters, illustrating that even if someone seems to be saying all the right things, it might still be too good to be true.

How to protect yourself from romance and friendship scams:

• Try to remove emotion from your decision-making. Be really careful if you're lending or giving someone money. No matter how urgent their reason might seem, it’s important you think it through. We'd always suggest talking it through first with a trusted friend or your family.
• You can check if the person you’re talking to is really who they say they are. Pictures can be edited, and fake profiles can easily be made. Performing a reverse image search on a web search engine can show whether the photos have been taken from another website or social media platform.
• It’s a red flag if the person you’ve been talking to online won’t video call or meet you in person. Fraudsters will make excuses about why this can’t happen or change plans to do so at the last minute.
• Never send money or give card details, online account details, or copies of important personal documents to anyone you’ve only met online.